


If I was a kid

by N4meless



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Clay | Dream Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Crying, Dream & Sam & Punz are siblings, Dream is a child in this, Hurt Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt No Comfort, Mild Blood, Older Sibling Luke | Punz, Older Sibling Sam | Awesamdude, Pandora's Vault Prison, Parent Cara | CaptainPuffy, Sad Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Sad Luke | Punz, Sad Sam | Awesamdude, Sam | Awesamdude-Centric, Violence, but not by blood, it’s about Dream but, mention of corpses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:54:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29828025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/N4meless/pseuds/N4meless
Summary: He heard the sound of porcelain hitting obsidian and looked back at Dream. The mask that used to sit on the prisoner‘s face was now laying on the ground, split in half.  Sam expected the face of a grown man, of a 21 year old one. Oh was he wrong.
Relationships: Cara | CaptainPuffy & Clay | Dream, Cara | CaptainPuffy & Clay | Dream & Luke | Punz & Sam | Awesamdude, Clay | Dream & Luke | Punz, Clay | Dream & Luke | Punz & Sam | Awesamdude, Clay | Dream & Sam | Awesamdude & Wilbur Soot
Comments: 102
Kudos: 778





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!TW: Blood, Corpses, Violence!!  
> Blood is only mentioned like twice, corpses are only mentioned, not described and the violence just happens, not described in detail but I thought I should add it in case.
> 
> This is my first time writing a fanfic so I apologize if it’s not so well written.  
> Anyway, happy reading :)

_Tommy was killed by Dream._

The message was out for everyone on the server to read. So when Sam saw it, he was beyond furious. He stepped into the prison, every step taken after the first felt like quicksand. The more steps he would take, the more he will sink into the sand, into the guilt, the guilt of not protecting the child. He failed the boy, he failed Tommy. He was just a kid . A kid who had gone through so much, so much a child shouldn’t have suffered at this age.

Tommy grew on him, since Dream was put into prison. Sam, the warden, was the reason because Tommy died by the hands of Dream. Because he couldn’t find the security problem in time, that occurred a week ago. Because of him, Tommy couldn’t leave the cell earlier. He got brought back to reality by a mechanical sound. He must have pulled the lever while being lost in his thoughts. The only thing separating Sam and Dream  ~~ and Tommy ~~ was the huge wall of lava, hundreds of liter of red-orange-ish glowing liquid flowing down from the ceiling. 

The guilt and sadness he felt soon got replaced by anger once again, when he spotted the unmoving body of Tommy laying on the side of the cell and Dream sitting there, knees pulled close to his chest and his head in his arms, when the lava finally lowered itself. 

Sam slowly walked towards the cell. The noise of shoes scrapping against the stone floor made Dream look up. His white mask with the crudely drawn smiley looked at Sam, almost mockingly. It felt like Dream was actually mocking him, telling him how he didn’t arrive on time, saying it was his fault Tommy died. ~~ Little did he know that Dream didn’t even think of that while looking at him. The guilt the prisoner felt was hidden behind the expressionless mask.  ~~

Sam couldn’t hold back his anger. He rushed towards Dream, grabbing the man by his collar and hoisting him up.  
~~ He didn’t notice how light he was. ~~

“Sam-” Dream tried to say but got cut off by said person.

“WHY?! WHY DID YOU KILL HIM?”

“I- He attacked me f-first. It was self-defense-”

“And that’s why you killed him?”

“N-no! He would have k-killed me, if I didn’t d-do anything! I DIDN’T MEAN TO KILL HIM! I AM SOR-”

He couldn’t finish his sentence as Sam smashed his head towards the obsidian wall. He felt blood running down his neck.

“HE WAS JUST A CHILD, DREAM! A CHILD! YOU KILLED A CHILD, DONT YOU FEEL BAD?!”

That’s when Dream realized.

“And?” He managed to say before Sam slapped him.

“SO WHAT IF HE WAS A CHILD?”

Sam smashed his head into the wall.

Dream felt his vision blur.

“IF I WAS A CHILD, TOO, WHAT THEN?”

Sam smashed his head into the wall. Again.

“If I was a child, what would you do, Sam..?”

Dream’s vision turned black. Blood spilling out of the wound on the back of his head.

_ Dream was killed by Awesamdude. _

That’s when Sam realized what he has done. He killed him. He didn’t mean to do that.  ~~ That’s what Dream said, too. ~~ The grip he had on the collar was softening, Dream’s lifeless body slipping onto the ground. The wall behind him was now covered in blood of the person he just killed mere seconds ago. Now he was in the cell, surrounded by the corpses of Dream and Tommy.

He heard the sound of porcelain hitting obsidian and looked back at Dream. The mask that used to sit on the prisoner’s face was now laying on the ground, split in half.Dream’s face, which was hidden for the entirety of the time, was now uncovered for the world to see. Sam expected the face of a grown man, of a 21 year old one. Oh was he wrong.  


His eyes widened. 

** Nononono **

It was not the face of a man, but the one of a child. A childlike face littered in scars. Now it made sense to him. Thinking back, he realized what the words of the  ~~ child ~~ now dead person meant.

_ “If I was a child, what would you do, Sam?” _

He said it, said those words, because he  ** was  ** a child. ~~As he was secretly screaming for help.~~

Taking a closer look, Sam realized that Dream might have been even younger than Tommy-

‘N-No. Please no. I- I killed a child. No- no I put a kid into prison and then tortured and starved it- A **child**.’

_“YOU KILLED A CHILD, DONT YOU FEEL BAD?”,_ that’s what he said and now here he is. He hit one, he tortured one, he manipulated one, he starved one, he **killed** one.

How did Dream even hide the fact, that he was a child? He spent years with the boy, ~~the boy he saw as his~~ ~~ little ~~ ~~brother,~~ so how?  ~~ Because he was tall, he had the build and the mask hid his biggest secret.  He looked just like an adult. He got the chance to fool everyone and that’s what he did. ~~

* * *

“Sammy! Look!” Dream said, holding a bouquet of flowers in his hands.

“Whoah, they are so pretty!” Sam answered him.

“Yes and I want you to take them!”

“I- are you sure?”

“Yes!” Dream giggled handing him the bouquet.

Sam smiled softly back.

“Thank you.”

* * *

  
Sometimes Sam did think that Dream was acting rather childish. Now he knows why, because he **was a** **child**.  His heart clenched, he was going to be sick. Sam knelt down and slowly reached for the mask. His fingers hovering over the material, as he turned it around. There was a number written on the back of it.

_12.08.2004_ (12th August not 8th December)

He knew the first 2 numbers. How could he not? It was Dream’s birthday and if that was Dream’s birthday then it meant that the last 4 digits must be the child’s birth year.

_Dream was_ _ younger _ _than Tommy_.

He felt tears running down his face but he didn’t bother wiping them away, instead he cradled Dream’s lifeless body into his arms and ran his hand over the smaller boy’s face. If he didn’t know better, he might have thought that the younger was sleeping peacefully, but he does know better, he knows that Dream is no longer alive. And he knows that he was the one to kill him.  
  


Sam was aware that Tommy’s body was still laying across the room and he felt bad, he really did but no matter how close Tommy and him had become, Dream was still his **little brother.** ~~ And you killed him.  
  
~~

He slowly picked Dream up, this time noticing how light and thin he was, he was about to cry again. Standing up from his crouching position, he walked over to Tommy with Dream over his shoulder and picked Tommy up as well. _It’s time to leave._ The way out of the prison felt so long, enough time to get lost in his thoughts once again.

* * *

„Punzy! Sammy!“ Dream called out to them.

The moment they turned around, they were already tackled down onto the ground by Dream and were brought into a tight hug.

„Wha- what’s wrong, Dream?“ Sam said, although laughing at the action of the younger.

„Ugh, don’t do that next time.“ The other blonde, Punz said. Even though the words sounded mean, Sam could tell that he didn’t mean it that way, quite the opposite actually. Punz always pretended to be a tough one but Sam knew better, that guy was a big softie for Dream.

So despite his words, both of them hugged back and the boy in the green hoodie simply giggled.

_ He was happy. _

* * *

  
The memory made him remember _Punz_. 

It has always been the three of them, Dream, Sam and Punz, even before all the wars broke out on the server. They were their own little happy family, they grew up together, way before Dream met SapNap and George, however, neither Sam nor Punz has ever seen the younger’s face, not even once, because they respected his privacy. Would things have turned out different if Dream’s secret would have never been a secret in the first place?

He started to wonder what Punz will think of him. Did he still see Dream as his little brother? What will he do when he knows that Sam killed  their little brother? ~~Everyone was able to read in the chat that he was the killer.~~ Especially when he finds out that Dream was in fact their **little ** brother-

What if-

“Sam?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I’m aware murder cannot be excused, however, Tommy was always the one to hit Dream and he usually didn’t hit back, so this one was more of an accident so yea self-defense on Dream’s side...  
> And yea, there are adults who indeed look like children sometimes but let’s just ignore that shhh


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter!  
> Happy reading :)

“Sam?”

Sam looked up as he got snapped out of his thoughts. In front of him was a crowd, many members of the server were gathered in the main hall of the prison. It was Punz’ voice that called out to him, so he looked directly into the blonde’s eyes. A feeling of guilt immediately settled in as the realization hit him as why everyone even came here in the first place. They must have heard or better said, read about the news already, they were all here for the same reason. They were here to confirm the last two death messages with their own eyes.

A wave of emotions washed over the warden as he slowly fell on his knees, carefully setting down the two bodies he had carried out of the cell. Punz slowly walked towards the man, hands ready to pull the other into a hug.

“Sam? What hap-”

“P-Punz... I- I’m so sorry. I killed him. I- I killed our little brother. What do I do?” Sam stuttered out, voice shaky.

The others were simply watching the scene unfolding in front of their eyes, Sam saw through his tears that some of them held themselves back to not run and hug Tommy’s lifeless body.

“H-He was just a kid, Punz. A kid! A-And I killed him.. I didn’t only kill, no, I did so much worse. What do I do?”

“What are you talking about? He was an adult, Sam. Everyone knows that. He did a lot of shit, he deserved-”

“NO! HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?! W-Was he not the same little brother to you as h-he was for me? He was just a child. T-the youngest member of the SMP, Punz! And I took his last life.”

“Hey, hey, I- I think you are kinda mixing up the names here, Sam. We all know Tommy is the youngest of us all and Dream was the one to kill him, not you, right? I’m sure you are just confused right now, so calm down and tell me what happened, okay?” Punz tried to calm the other down, visibly confused.

Ah, right, Punz doesn’t know Dream’s real age. No one does, the secret the boy has kept since he met Sam and Punz. Sam bit his lower lip, before he took two deep breaths to calm himself, he had to tell them, but his throat felt like it’s tied up, preventing him to speak, so he simply pointed with his finger on Dream’s face, watching as Punz’ gaze slowly drifted to where Dream’s body lied.

The first confused look turned into a shocked one in a matter of seconds.

* * *

It was a stormy night, but Punz didn’t care, despite the loud thunders he didn’t have any problems falling asleep to these circumstances. However, he squinted his eyes, when he noticed how the door to his room slowly creaked open.

“P-Punzy?” Dream said with a tiny voice, his head poking out of the small gap. He had the hood of his green hoodie that he always wore, pulled over his head. The white porcelain mask hiding the expression the younger is making right now.

Well, and there it goes, his sleep, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel bothered by it.

“Come in, Dream.” Punz simply said.

The boy quickly stepped into the room and closed the door. Waddling like a little duck to where the bed, on which Punz was laying, was located. Despite his height during that time, he looked like a small child at that very moment ~~because he was one.~~ Dream slipped into the sheets and hugged the older tightly, before said man could even ask what was wrong. Punz didn’t miss to notice how the body of the boy shook slightly, so he wrapped his arms around the younger in an attempt to calm him down.   
  


“What’s wrong, hm?” Punz asked in a soft tone.

“I-I don’t like thunders and lightnings p-particularly much.” Dream admitted with a shaky voice, seemingly embarrassed, as he nuzzled his head into the other’s chest. His embarrassment only seemed to grow, when he heard Punz quietly chuckling.

“Pft, what are you? A child? A 12 year old?” 

~~He didn’t notice how the other froze for a second.~~

“FIRSTLY, yes, I’m still a child. 17 to be exact ~~a~~ ~~lie, he was barely 12~~ and-”

“17 years old and still scared of thunders-”

“AND. Everyone can be scared of thunders, no matter the age. LET ME SPEAK FIRST, IDIOT.”

“Whatever.” Punz rolled his eyes, but finding the new obtained information quite amusing.

Punz slowly began to caress the other’s back, noticing that the shaking still didn’t stop and so they fell into a comfortable silence, enjoying the sound the rain made when it hit the window. Sometimes a thunder would randomly occur, making the younger flinch and whimper, but Punz always assured him that everything was fine and that he was safe. After a while Dream spoke up.

“Punzy?”

“I told you to stop calling me that.”

Dream groaned “Ugh, whatever, **Punz.** ”

“Yes, Dream?”

“Where is Sammy?”

“Pretty sure he’s in his room”

“He’s not. If he was, I wouldn’t be here cuddling with you, but with Sammy because I know he wouldn’t make fun of my fears.” Dream said with a jokingly annoyed voice.

“Hey, that’s rude. Anyway, he must have gone outside to gather supplies.”

“But look at the heavy rain! What if he gets hit by lightning-”

“He won’t, he will come home safely.”

“Promise?” “Promise.”

They both fell asleep and on the next day, Dream tackled Sam the moment he spotted him, hugging him tightly.

“Haha, sorry for worrying you.” Sam said laughing, hugging the younger back. Dream just hummed.

_Dream loved hugs._

* * *

Thinking back, Dream always seemed to have those moments where one would think that they are looking at a child right now and _now he knew why._

“I- I’m pretty sure that’s not Dream, right? I mean we have never seen his face! This could be anyone and you just simply left Dream in the cell, trying to fool us!” Punz stuttered out, not wanting to face the truth.

“Punz. You know better than **anyone** else that I wouldn’t do such thing.” _Punz knew_ , he knew Sam would never do something like that, but it’s better than to know that your seemingly child-brother just got killed, right?

“Haha... well, maybe he was just an adult with the face of a child-” Punz tried to reason, but got interrupted as Sam held out Dream’s broken mask, without a word, for the blonde to take.   
  


“Turn it around.” Sam ordered but it sounded more like a plea. So that’s what Punz did, with shaky hands he slowly and hesitantly turned around the mask. He was met with the same number Sam had seen a few minutes ago.

“You know what this means, right?” The warden asked, his voice shaking.

“... he was a kid?” Punz answered, though it sounded more like a question than anything else. Sam gave a hum of confirmation, not trusting his voice right now.

The blond tried his best to hold back his tears, because who would he be to break down in front of so many people, ‘just’ because he got hit with the fact that the person, everyone saw as a psychopath ~~he was just a child that got cornered and had to fight back~~ , someone who is to blame for every war on the server ~~it wasn’t his fault though~~ , someone who seemed to have snapped for no reason ~~there was a reason~~ , is finally dead. That would be absurd, right? Right?

_“He did a lot of shit, he deserved-” What was it that he wanted to say at that moment? “He did a lot of shit, he deserved..”_

**_“To die”_ **

His eyes widened at the thought. He really thought that Dream, his **little** brother, deserved to die just mere minutes ago.

_‘Now what? Just because you found out that he was a 16-year old, you changed your ideals? Pathetic.’_

He should have never had such thoughts about his brother in the first place. Even if Dream was a 21-year old ~~he would still be your **little**~~ ~~brother~~ he shouldn’t be thinking that he deserved death-

What kind of a big brother was he? It was his responsibility as his big brother to make sure that Dream wouldn’t become the way he had become. But he let it happen. ~~Because he wasn’t a good brother.~~ He should have talked to Dream, he should have noticed the change in the younger’s behavior, because he spent **years** with the boy, but he never did. No, he even ended up betraying his little brother, who put all his trust into him, because he was the **only** one he could trust, but he went and betrayed him, because Tommy offered more. More? _What’s worth more than the trust your brother held towards you? ~~Nothing~~._

He needed to apologize, he needed to make sure that Dream knew that he was sorry, sorry that he let him down, when the boy needed him the most, needed someone he could trust.

Someone who would hug him during stormy nights and reassure him that everything will be okay, that he was safe, that no one could hurt him. ~~But Dream had to endure everything by himself, with no one by his side.~~  
Just the mere thought of Dream, curled up **alone** in a corner of his house while the rain fell and the lightenings lit up the cloudy sky, accompanied by thunders, a combo, Punz knew, that Dream was afraid of, hurt his heart. It hurt.

Even when Dream would not forgive him, he would still have to apologize.

Punz knew he **had to** apologize.

_“I’m so sorry...”_

But he also knew that Dream will **never** be able to hear the apology.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The whole fic is literally just dialogue bye-  
> I planned this chapter to be more angsty but ehhh
> 
> It’s really unrealistic that a 12yo looks like a 17yo but let’s just say he grew very fast but said growth stopped at a young age so around when he was 13-14 (real age) + mask to hide ur face = adult look :D


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had my Spanish exam yesterday and had to study so I couldn’t write anything, sorry  
> But here have chapter 3 :)  
> I don’t really like the chapter particularly much but I hope you guys still enjoy it!
> 
> By the way, my story definitely does not run in the same timeline as the actual canon story.

The silence after Punz' apology didn't stretch out for long as shuffling can be heard in the back of the crowd that was blocking the exit of the prison.  
  
"The death message isn't true, right? My-My duckling isn't dead, right?", a familiar voice stuttered out, audibly out of breath, as they probably rushed all the way here as soon as they saw the message. The voice was soon revealed as Puffy's voice when her head popped out of the crowd and she stepped forward, catching her breath as she scanned Sam's face for answers, however, her eyes soon drifted to the body beside him, eyes widening, realizing who that was. The green hoodie was an unmistakeable trademark of Dream's.  
  
Dream had told her in the past, how important the green hoodie was to him, being a gift from Sam and Punz for one of his birthdays. Since that day he started to only wear the green clothing, whenever and wherever he went to. But before the peace and normality was destroyed by war and violence, Puffy had gifted him a selfmade hoodie with the typical green color ~~that everyone grew to fear~~ and a little smiley face added onto the left side of the chest.  
  
The reason for the present was simple, the original hoodie had been too small for the boy. It's not the kind of small, where the clothing started to look like a croptop, no, it still did its job, definitely, covering up Dream's torso, however, every little movement would make the hem go up slightly, revealing the man's stomach.

Dream usually shrugged it off, whenever Puffy brought it up, saying he doesn't really care, but she knew Dream would have replaced the hoodie a long time ago if it wasn't for the fact that it was a gift from his two brothers, so she did an all-nighter to finish her own hoodie as soon as possible. Despite that, she was still very surprised, to say the least, when she saw Dream actually wearing it the next day. Sure, she put a lot of effort into it, but it made her heart swell with fondness, knowing that her duckling replaced a very important item with one of her own.  
  
That's the reason why it was so unmistakable. There was only one single exemplar of the hoodie on this server. And the owner of said exemplar? Dream. So unlike Punz, she accepted the fact that the unmoving body on the floor was indeed Dream, right away. And as fast as she realized that, she ran towards the body, kneeling down and pulling her duckling into her lap while she hugged him. Pulling back, she stared at the boy's face, stroking his cheek with her soft hand, every warmth the body held, now gone. "My duckling...", she sobbed out as tears filled her eyes, "I'm so sorry. I failed you."

* * *

Puffy was in a village near her own house to gather some supplies. On her way back she noticed a person following her, however, she didn't think quite much of it and kept walking until she reached the forest, which she had to pass through in order to arrive at her house. The crunching of leaves alerted her that the person from before was still there. She first thought they simply had the same way home, but there was no way the stranger had to pass the forest as well. She rarely saw anyone enter it in the first place!  
  
"Who are you?", she called out, turning around. There stood a boy, or a man? She couldn't quite tell because of the white porcelain mask covering his face and his height didn't seem to make the situation easier. The person was tall, around 6 feet, but the posture made him look like a scared child.  
  
"I- I'm Dream, I didn't mean any harm.", the boy answered in a whisper, startled that he was noticed by her. At that, Puffy's expression quickly softened, realizing he was no threat.  
  
"You've been following me for a while now, do you have no where to go?" She asked softly, trying not to scare the other further, but the boy didn't answer, only fiddling with his fingers awkwardly, looking down at the ground, well that's what she assumed because his mask didn't give anything away. She sighed, motioning for the man ~~boy~~ to follow her and he did.

It was oddly weird, that she trusted a 6 feet tall man who followed her all the way from the village to the forest, enough to turn around and leave herself vulnerable. He could just sneak up to her right now and strangle her- but she trusted him for some reason, she couldn’t explain why.   
  
The walk was mostly silent, she asked a few questions but they were left unanswered, until she asked how old he was.   
“So... how old are you?”

“... I’m 17”, Dream answered.

“17? I see... I’m a year older than you!” She said, not expecting an answer to that.

It felt weird, the boy looked like a duckling quietly following its mama duck while only being a year younger than herself. If it wasn’t for his height she really would have thought the boy was like 10 year old or something ~~he was 12~~ Puffy felt like a mom adopting a child, silently giggling at the thought. ‘A duckling, huh?’, she smiled to herself.

They soon arrived at her house, she opened the door, letting the younger enter it first, following close behind.

“Just take a seat, I’ll make you something.” She said, watching as the other awkwardly sat down. 

The sheep hybrid entered the kitchen and five minutes later she returned with a glass of hot chocolate. “There you go!”, Puffy told him as she handed him the cup. Dream thanked her quietly, lifting his mask slightly, only over his mouth and took small sips.

She sat down in a seat, opposite of Dream’s and just watched him drinking the drink, seeming to enjoy it. Puffy didn’t expect him to suddenly speak up.

“I-I got lost.. I was with my brothers and s-suddenly lost them, my communicator is broken so I couldn’t reach them. I have never been here before, that’s why I didn’t know how to go back. You looked trustworthy and I-I really liked your hair, so I decided to follow you.” Dream realized that it was a very dumb reason to follow someone, he was very embarrassed to say the least.

Puffy was dumbfounded at first but soon started laughing. “Awww thank you! Would you like to tell me the name of your brothers so I can contact them? I’m sure they are worried for you.”   
  


“You should probably rather contact Sam, you should find him under awesamdude.” Dream answered more confidently now.

She nodded and soon typed into her communicator.

_You whisper to awesamdude: Hello! I assume you are Sam, your brother who goes by the name of Dream is currently at my house. He told me he got lost and his communicator isn’t working at the moment. You should come pick him up :D_

She got a respond almost immediately

_awesamdude whispers to you; Hello, yes I’m Sam and thank you so much! We were worried sick, could you send me your coordinates?_

She giggled at the answer and sent him her coordinates.

“Your brother is gonna come to pick you up.” Puffy told Dream who simply nodded. They fell into a comfortable silence while waiting for his siblings to arrive. Not even 10 minutes later, they heard a knock on the door, rushing towards it and pulling it wide open.   
  


“Hello, I’m Sam and that’s Punz, uhh are you the person who texted me a few minutes ago?” Sam asked, studying the other’s face.

“Ah, my apologies, I forgot to introduce myself, I’m Puffy and yea I’m that person and-”   
  


“SAMMY, PUNZY!!” Dream came running out, about to hug Sam but Sam stepped away, crashing into Punz who stood behind the taller man and falling together onto the ground. Everyone started laughing, well, except Punz who got his white hoodie all dirty. 

After a little small talk they decided to say their goodbyes.“Thank you so much again for looking after him, goodbye!” Sam thanked her. “My pleasure! You should come visit me again.” Puffy told them, smiling.

They started to walk back as Puffy stood at the door and waved them goodbye until the trio was out of her sight.

Despite her words of visiting again, she definitely didn’t expect the boy to actually come back the next day. But she let him in happily, she hadn’t had any company for a while now, so why not take it? She felt like she was taking care of a child. It turned into a routine, the boy visited her every day and one day Dream told her to come visit him. So that’s what she did, she got invited to stay for dinner and the four of them talked.

She noticed that they weren‘t brothers by blood, they didn’t look alike at all but it warmed her heart to know that her duckling has such amazing people around him. And yes, she started to call him her duckling and Dream didn‘t seem to mind.

They ended up having a weird family dynamic. She was like a mom to Dream but she wasn’t a mom to Sam and Punz, most likely because they were older than her but whatever. While the two older ones were brothers to Dream, they were like brothers to Puffy as well.

_It was truly weird, but she liked it._

* * *

This time it was Punz to hand her over the porcelain mask, but she didn’t take it, she simply looked at the date written on the back of it and turned back to her child.

“You were just a kid... you-you shouldn’t have suffered so much... so, so much at 16. I’m sorry, I couldn’t give you the childhood you deserved.” Puffy cried out, hugging the cold body impossibly tighter. 

It wasn’t rare for her to cry, she cried a lot during the wars, crying because she couldn’t believe her duckling, she technically adopted 4 years ago, would do something like that. Just like everyone else Puffy had thought that Dream had gone insane, starting wars and killing people for fun, but thinking back now she realized that they provoked him into doing so.

Dream got pushed to the edge, like the edge of a cliff, one more step and he would have fallen, fallen into the ocean and suffocated, so in order to save himself he had to fight back, even if it meant to distance himself from the people he held so close.

During the first war, Dream sometimes sought Puffy’s comfort, he vented to her, talking about a **big happy family** , telling her that he didn’t mean to start a war, didn’t mean to split the whole server into two. She told him that it was okay, that things will become normal again, but she didn’t know that the future was already destined the moment L’Manberg declared independence.   
  
・・・・・・・

“Are you trying to excuse his actions just because he’s a kid?! He did horrible thi-” Quackity suddenly screamed out but soon got interrupted by Puffy herself.

“Have you looked at yourself? You all only saw Dream as the only villain, pretending that none of you did anything wrong, but no! SOME OF YOU DID JUST AS BAD THINGS AS DREAM DID! You pushed him into doing the things he had done... and yes he was a kid and just like Tommy and Tubbo, he shouldn’t have suffered this much, he should have enjoyed a childhood like most of us did. Children make mistakes... at the end, it was mostly our fault, we adults should have been better, it was our responsibility to not let this happen, but we did.”

Quackity didn’t dare to talk back. The room grew silent once again, however the silence soon got broken by Tubbo as he ran towards Tommy’s body. Despite the things that happened between those two, they were still best friends at the end of the day, so he cried, mourning over his friend’s death as Phil slowly stroked the child’s back.

“Let’s bury him, okay?” Phil asked Tubbo softly, trying to calm him down. Tubbo just nodded, so Phil slowly picked up the dead body and made his way out of the prison.

Sam, Punz and Puffy just watched as many people left with Phil and Tubbo until it was only Sapnap and George left standing. Their eyes were filled with regret as Sapnap tried to speak up, “I-I’m sor-”

“It’s fine, you shouldn’t apologize to us, but to Dream... well, it’s too late for that now, isn’t it?” Sam laughed bitterly, knowing damn well that he wasn’t able to apologize to Dream as well.   
  
The duo nodded slowly and soon left like everyone else did. Sam, Punz and Puffy looked at each other, eyes still filled with tears, and nodded. They didn’t need words to know what the other was thinking right now. Sam slowly kneeled down and took Dream’s body from Puffy’s embrace, carrying him bridal style. Punz held a hand towards Puffy to help her stand up.

_Together_ they left the prison behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so sorry for the long flashbacks, I just really want to add some moments of their past, where they could have noticed that Dream was a child. And maybe these flashbacks will be the only comfort in this fic... who knows.
> 
> And thank you so, so much for all the kudos and nice comments I got! It means a lot to me and I’m happy to see that you guys seem to like my first fic! I’m also very sorry if I don’t reply to comments, sometimes I don’t know how to response, sometimes I just feel a little too anxious.
> 
> In case the ages become too complicated:  
> Sam: 24  
> Punz: 24  
> Puffy: 22  
> Dream: 16 (fake: 21)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short filler to connect the last chapter with the upcoming one!

The way back home was silent, neither knew what to say, it was a lot to take in after all. The last lives of two people were taken on a single day.They soon parted ways, Puffy going another direction than the other two.

“So... you will-” Puffy didn’t finish her sentence when she saw Sam nodding, already knowing what she wanted to ask. “Alright, see you both soon then...”, she said, giving a finale smile that didn’t reach their eyes, but the two brothers knew it wasn’t a smile for them, it was a smile to convince herself that she was okay, which she wasn’t, but who was at this point?

Sam and Punz said their goodbyes soon after, as they turned around, heading for their own house. The silence surrounding them was suffocating and heavy. Punz felt miserable, he thought that the only person to blame right now, was himself, so that’s what he did. It felt like there were invisible hands slowly clutching around his neck, squeezing oh so lightly. He felt like he couldn’t breathe.

But then he remembered Sam, no matter how bad Punz felt at the moment, he couldn’t imagine how much worse Sam feels right now. After all ~~the warden~~ the hybrid’s hands were covered in the blood of their former family member and no matter how much Punz tried to change his mind, unlike the blonde, Sam was the _direct_ cause of Dream’s death. 

Sam’s face was unreadable, he didn’t wanna think about it, because he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold back the tears if he started to think, ~~think how pained Dream sounded, think about the moments where the child seemingly screamed for help~~ so he didn’t, he simply shut off his brain.

When they finally arrived at home, Sam stored Dream’s body somewhere cold, so it wouldn’t rot just yet. He had already decided to make the coffin and the tombstone by himself. He will make it perfect, that’s the least what he can do for Dream. So he will take his time. Sam was known for being very talented when it comes to building things but these were usually buildings, this time he had to concentrate more than he usually did, he needed steady hands to carefully carve the words into the stone, maybe some patterns into the wood of the coffin and he definitely needed to make sure to choose the perfect material.   
  
In the evening of the same day, everyone got a message from Phil, inviting them for Tommy’s funeral on the next day. Sam didn’t know if he should feel surprised that the funeral was so soon, but at the same time he kinda expected it. 

On the following day Sam and Punz met up with Puffy to walk to the place they were invited to. The funeral was held near Techno’s and Phil’s shared house, everyone seemed to have come. There were definitely many tears shed, however, Sam couldn’t bring himself to cry, it was weird and he felt really bad that he didn’t share the pain the others felt, but he had a feeling that he needed to save those tears for another time. He took a quick glance at the people beside him, Punz and Puffy, and noticed soon that they also didn’t cry... so he wasn’t the only one, huh?

A few minutes later the hybrid felt a hand on his shoulder and looked to his side to see who the hand belonged to, it was Phil.

“You good, mate?” The man asked concerned as he got a nod as response. “What about... you know?”

Sam knew what he was talking about, but he was thankful that he didn’t bring up the name. “I- I am currently working on the coffin, later the tombstone, I want it to be perfect that’s the last thing I can do.” Phil nodded understandingly and gave him a reassuring smile, squeezing the other’s shoulder for comfort.

“You should probably try to comfort Tubbo, he needs it more than me.”, Sam said as he looked at the younger boy standing in front of Tommy’s grave, crying.

Phil just sighed, “Don’t worry, Ranboo will take care of him, I was never that close with Tubbo.” It was Sam’s turn to nod again.

They had a small conversation, Puffy and Punz joining in a few minutes later, exchanging a few words and after that they said their goodbyes and headed home once more. ~~They never knew that Tommy’s ghost had appeared a day later.~~

Sam worked hard on his little project, starting from the very beginning when he didn’t seem to like the outcome of the object he was working on. Four days went by until he was finally satisfied, being now 5 days since Dream’s death, the emptiness he felt, never leaving. 

After asking for Punz’ opinion on the finished ‘product’, he decided to send out invites for the upcoming funeral, however, he didn’t get to type the invitation as he saw a mysterious message in the chat.

_‘Everyone, including the ghosts, gather in front of the community house, please.’_

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger? Uh oh  
> Anyway I kinda dislike this chapter a bit, I skipped a lot and didn’t go into detail in this one, it’s really just a filler, I hope the next chapter will be better.


End file.
